Ninety percent of people who achieve extraordinary success are highly emotionally intelligent. Emotional intelligence includes the ability to use body language in order to demonstrate one's credibility. Our body language speaks for us whether we like it or not. That is why it pays to be aware of some basic rules. The most frequent mistakes in nonverbal communication emotionally intelligent people do not make were highlighted on Forbes.com. What should you avoid?
Slouching
Standing or sitting with you back hunched and the whole body slackened clearly says you are bored and would like to be somewhere else. On the other hand, standing upright and holding your shoulders back is a sign of strength, respect and interest.
Exaggerated gestures
Once you start gesturing too much, it's a signal that you are trying to exaggerate or otherwise modify the truth. You can only earn trust by smaller gestures which show your openness. For example, showing your palms means you have nothing to hide.
Leaning away from others
When someone is talking and you lean backwards, it's like saying you are not interested and feel uncomfortable, clear evidence of distrust. If you want to show confidence and interest, lean towards the person speaking. However, beware of moving to close. If you stand closer than half a meter to other people, you give the impression that you do not respect their personal space, where they feel comfortable and safe.
Crossing arms
This gesture indicates that you are not open to others and what they say. It does not matter whether you are smiling and talking about pleasant things. If you do not know what to do with your hands, you had better put them in your pockets or lay them on the table. Also, avoid holding your hands clenched into fists.
Excessive nodding
Fast nodding indicates your fear of disapproval. People would interpret it as your attempt to show that you agree with something or understand something you actually do not understand.
Playing with your hair or mobile phone
Another signal of disrespect for others, but also of your fear, distraction or even arrogance. The same applies for the case when you keep on looking at your watch when speaking with others.
Poor eye contact
As far as eye contact, two extreme cases may occur and both of them are wrong. The first is avoiding eye contact and the second is staring. Doing either makes you look like you're trying to hide something and you do not trust yourself, or that you are aggressive.
Scowling and rolling your eyes
Frowning or having an unhappy expression on your face tells others that they are responsible for your bad mood. It makes them feel uncomfortable. When you begin to roll your eyes, it is another clear mark of your lack of respect, and others will start avoiding you systematically. Smile to make a good impression.
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