You have a great employee in your team, but you believe he could be an even a better performer. He is developing too slowly and you think you could help him. You consider coaching as the best possible technique. The problem is the employee is not interested in your help. He either avoids or postpones your offers to get coached, or he has already expressed his resistance openly. Is there a way to make him change his mind?
This issue was discussed in a recent article on the Harvard Business Review website. First of all, you should consider whether coaching is the right solution. In a case where you need the employee to follow an exactly determined process of working, coaching is not a good choice. You will achieve greater success if you give him clear instructions. If, on the other hand, you want the employee to reflect more about himself and his work and to find possible ways of improvement then try to understand why he refuses coaching.
What is the problem?
Do not accept the conclusion that the employee is weird. There is usually a reasonable explanation. He may not trust you enough and thinks your offer indicates he is not good enough. He may have had a bad experience with coaching in the past. Or he may think coaching is unnecessary, because he will (or will not) be promoted either way. First, try to think if you have possibly contributed to his negative attitude. Then go and ask him directly. Ask open-ended questions.
What do you want to achieve?
The employee needs to hear from you why exactly you are offering him coaching. Clearly explain what you are trying to do and why. You must show him he can trust you and that coaching will help him in some way. Always show appreciation for his present performance so that he doesn't feel that he has been working well and you are suddenly telling him the opposite. Ensure him that your conversation is confidential.
If, despite all efforts, you fail to convince the employee, do not force him. It would probably not improve his performance and only worsen your relationship. Rather stop talking about coaching now and discuss it at a later date.
-kk-